Beneath the Smile

He looks to you like a born leader, he handles life-issues like an expert, and he is every upcoming youth’s mentor but beneath his smile, he is battling with his sexuality. He wishes he could enjoy sex like it is portrayed in the porn films and romance novels. He has an urge that is barely pacified each time he has sex with his wife.
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She is a diva. Her voice is like  a nightingale’s, she has everything a young lady would aspire for; fame, wealth and connection but she has this past that keeps haunting her every night and behind closed doors, she can’t stop wetting her pillow with tears. She wishes she could change the consequences that her wayward past life has on her future. She had aborted in the past and this has left her with a ruptured womb. What man would want to marry such a woman, she often asks herself.

They make a cute couple; they are a bundle of inspiration to countless lives as they reach out to souls to bless them on a regular basis, still, after so many years of marriage they are yet to have a child of their own. They give hope to people in the open yet on their bed they wish all hope is not lost for their marriage to birth biological children.

Dear Friends, let us ponder on the words of Paul of Tarsus which says, “We were troubled on every side; yet not distressed; we are perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; cast down, but not destroyed…” II Corinthians 4:8-9 I also love the words of wisdom from King Solomon which reads, “If you faint in the day of adversity, your strength is small”…Proverbs 24:10.

We all have our ‘thorn in the flesh’; it may be light or ugly. We all have scars, the memory of which may still be fresh or long forgotten, but in all, let our hope and determination to pull through be stronger than the urge to throw in the towel. This is not just the usual relationship article you read, this is a motivational pill for someone; it is the soothing balm for your soul. Weeping may endure for a night; surely joy comes in the morning. Dear friend, I write to remind you that there is light at the end of your tunnel and you will burst into a beautiful laugh soon.
Envisage the beautiful future you seek and laugh as if it is here already! Be hopeful, be grateful and be thankful for how far you have come. It will always be better. Seek professional help if need be but don’t give up on your life. Be strong at heart, you are a plus to the world!

A call to my Spouse’s ex

angry 3Are you in a relationship where your spouse’s ex keeps hovering and hanging around? Is your spouse’s phone constantly bombarded by his/her ex demanding needless attention? Do you ever wonder why single girls refuse to respect the sanctity of matrimony and keep pursuing married men despite even knowing his wife one on one? Just hang in there because I have a word for you right here….

Mimi knew of an unusual closeness between her spouse and Zima, only that she couldn’t place her finger on what exactly was going on. Her spouse; Mike and Zima grew up in the same neighborhood and Zima has always been regarded as a distant family friend. It was obvious to all close friends while Mike was growing up that Zima was obsessed with him but he always told anyone that cared to listen that he had no iota of feelings for Zima as he sees her like one of his siblings.

Over time and even after Mike got married, Zima still kept in touch. She shares all her relationship issues with Mike and patiently listens to his advice on the phone. She seemed to be having issues with almost every guy she dated; they were not measuring up to the kind of man she wants.

Note that intimacy is easily built with someone who you are in constant communication with. What you discuss often determines the kind of intimacy you build. If you are often discussing emotional and sensitive issues with someone of the opposite sex, it’ll get to a time that an emotional switch will be turned on for one of the party towards the other person and it just takes a matter of time before the other person catches the fire if the constant communication continues. This happened to Mike and before he knew what was wrong he had committed adultery with Zima. Shortly after she got pregnant, Mike was devastated; he had to run to one of his Mentors to tell him the mess he had found himself in. Not only did his Mentor scold him sternly, he demanded to see Zima who he told his mind about respecting the sanctity of a holy matrimony. You knew this man was married, why did you gun for him was his question to her.

All this while, Mimi did not know what was going on and her husband really didn’t want her to know at that time, she was too much of an angel to have been betrayed. She had always tried her best to satisfy her husband sexually, anytime she can’t meet up with his sexual cravings, she makes it up to him without delay the next day. She however did not know that Mike had stopped desiring her sexually…all to no fault of hers.

Many months later, Mimi knew all that transpired between her spouse and Zima….. Zima lost the pregnancy but the communication between Mike and Zima didn’t stop.

Mike’s explanation to his wife is that the calls are just platonic ones…no feelings attached but Mimi wants the calls to stop because she believes an old flame still has the potential of starting a fresh fire if fanned. She decided she had to talk to Zima since she had previously met her on one or two occasions. She took her husband’s phone and pulled a call through to Zima. “We have to talk….” was all she could say and Zima excused herself that she was in a public transport and that Mimi should call her back soon.

Mike got to know about the call and felt very bad….”I don’t have feelings for her again…I am only helping her with some information she needs for a project”, he told his wife. “Let her seek for help somewhere else….you’re not the right person to help her because of the past between you two”, Mimi replied her husband as she poured out her hurt and disappointment. Mike promised to keep a distance between him and Zima.

Mimi didn’t call Zima back rather she called Mike’s mentor who he confided in the past; she told him about the call she made to Zima. The mentor advised her not to call her back rather he gave her a prayer point, “That God would cause an irreconcilable quarrel between Mike and Zima”. He further told her that he would inform her when the time is right to call Zima if at all it would be necessary.

Mimi obeyed, she is now so concerned about her spouse. She has determined to make sure that sexual intimacy between her spouse and herself does not suffer. She learnt from her mentor that a man who is sexually ‘over fed’ at home will be too weak to respond to sexual distractions and cravings from ‘strange’ women.

Sexual intercourse results in a soul tie. It is very difficult to break such bonds because it is spiritual, it is a covenant. That is why it is very crucial that if you are married, sleep only with your spouse and if you’re still single, do not get involved in premarital sex (that’s God’s command). Married couples should avoid habitually denying each other of sex, so as to avoid falling into adultery for denying your body for too long; even Apostle Paul advices against it.

Devil hates happy home and that is always his target. God needs united couples and families to establish His kingdom on earth and devil will stop at nothing in frustrating that plan. Singles who wish to get married to men/women should think twice, God is not in support of this, it is one of the tricks of devil to distort the beautiful future of such singles. Dear beloved single, stop being obsessed with someone else’s spouse.